In mock debates, Portman’s "Obama” positions gaining support from Romney’s staff
Columbus, OH (Bob’s Blog): It's no secret that Ohio Sen.
Rob Portman has been playing President Obama in the mock debates for
Republican candidate Mitt Romney. What is not being disclosed is that the
positions Portman has been taking are winning considerable support from Romney’s
staff.
Brett O’Donnell, Romney’s campaign coach, lamented “It never
occurred to us that Obama’s ideas coming out of the mouth of a fellow Republican
make a lot more sense than the constant stream of lies, fabrications,
flip-flops and insanity that we had to adopt to get the nomination.”
“Frankly,” he added, “I can’t believe we won the first
debate Wednesday. Up until then, Portman was 19 and 0 in our practice debates.”
When asked his opinion as to why the President seemed so
flat, O’Donnell said, “We’re not sure, but we heard rumors that their mock debates
with John Kerry were held on Kerry’s SeaDoo and didn’t go well.”
One reporter asked O’Donnell what position changes they've made in
preparation for the second debate. “All of them,” he said. “You know the
Etch-A-Sketch thing wasn’t just a metaphor. We’ve done all our planning on one.
Romney insists on fluid positions.
In sports news, the Cleveland Browns have already lost
their game against the New York Giants tomorrow afternoon. Science fiction experts contend that seeing the Browns lose another game in the future is
the closest thing we have to time travel.
