Fox News to be renamed The Propaganda Channel (TPC)

     In a stunning admission that they are not a news network but a purveyor of right-wing innuendos, false accusations, backward interpretations of events and outright lies, the Board of Directors at Fox News have decided to bravely rename their show The  Propaganda Channel.

     “Starting immediately, we are no long attempting to report any events accurately,” said Sean Hannity. “We’ve found that it simply isn’t necessary to waste money obtaining facts when our viewers won’t believe them anyway."
     Reporters at other networks are not surprised and took issue with the idea that Fox would just now abandon attempts at accurate reporting. "We've not encountered an actual Fox journalist anywhere near Washington, D.C. or New York for decades," said an ABC White House correspondent.
     “We thought they were extinct;” said Chuck Todd of MSNBC, “We figured they were all victims of facts that made their heads explode.”
     Attempts to reach a reporter at Fox were unsuccessful. We were told that any journalists they might still have on their payroll were all out touring a bourbon factory in Kentucky.

 

Trump administration seeks site for cabinet meetings at Rikers Prison

White House aides have begun a search for sites to hold future cabinet meetings at Rikers Island Prison.
"With so many of Trump's people heading for jail, it seemed like a logical next step," said Sarah Huckabee-Sanders at today's press briefing. "It's simply easier to go there than it is to do all the paperwork to get them out of prison long enough to have them come here to the White House.

Prison officials are seeking help from New Jersey's Attorney General to prevent the move saying that their budget is not adequate to provide the security needed to transport that many of Trump's incarcerated "Best People Ever" to Washington D.C.
Speaker Paul Ryan has promised to close another National Park or put another 100,000 people living in Medicare facilities out on the street in order to find the funding for the President's request.
Critics of the President say it would be simpler to move the entire White House staff to Rikers as long as Trump is President. One Democratic Senator said they'll relocate the White House to an Evangelical church when Vice President Pence takes over.