Sgt. Schultz would have been proud

Muammar Gaddafi slips past Pakistani Army checkpoint by using alias Moamar Gadhafi

Chaman, Pakistan: (Bob’s Blog) Crack Pakistani Army Intelligence officers missed an opportunity to capture recently deposed despot Muammar Gaddafi. The former Libyan ruler and Condoleezza Rice Fan Club President apparently used a brilliant spy trick of adopting the alias Moamar Gadhafi on his passport papers.

“Who could have seen through a ruse like that,” said former Pakistani President and Army General Pervez Musharraf.  “The brilliance of not using a disguise and cleverly changing his name is more diabolical than almost any Pakistani soldier could be expected to recognize.”

“Besides,” Musharraf said, “photos taken at the check point show he wasn’t wearing dark glasses. It’s very much like when Osama bin Laden evaded Pakistani Army eyes by slouching two inches shorter than he actually was.”

Gaddafi’s whereabouts is currently unknown but high level Pakistani intelligence sources say that there is no way on earth that he’s nowhere on earth. “After utilizing the full extent of our intelligence sources, we determined that Gaddafi is somewhere,” said Gen. Haroon Aslam. “Pinpointing a specific location, that’s the challenge.”

When asked what measures they would take if they locate Gaddafi, the general said that they have a compound currently in foreclosure equipped with flat screen television, a dvd player and plenty of Condoleezza Rice videos. Meanwhile, the Pakistani Army has ordered the entire set of Hogan’s Heroes “Guarding for Dummies” training tapes.

When asked about strained relations with Pakistan, Republican Presidential candidate Michele Bachmann said, “First, we need to find Osama bin Laden, then if Obama doesn’t improve relations with Pakistan, I’m not buying any more Cashmere sweaters.”